Choices.

So I never really got around to telling you about my New Years Resolution did I? Well, my New Years resolution is to be unexpected; surprising in a good way. I think I am doing okay, but what do you think? I have started with my music; guess I could do some more....

Well we have many choices, now don't we? In the future, in the present, the past; the point is that we make choices that affect us. Some more then others but they affect us nonetheless. Some choices I have made are not the best; I mean I tend to not forgive a friend for a while; I don't really believe in second chances unless they have truely earned, and even though I grant them, I tend to be cautious for a while. Another choice I make is to not trust anyone. I trust, in all 2 people. Two of my best friends. Others I am open too, but I am not going to tell them anything important. I feel I am more protected that way; but I need to just let go; I can be more open; slowly starting to trust people, not just like that that, but, baby steps. I know some choices are hard to make too. Where it's about love, or friendship, or telling the truth. Even about our future. I have mentioned I want to be a vet; let me explain why I have made this choice.

I love animals, I love helping them in any way I can. I can't imagine doing anything else now. I dream of having many pets; living in the country near a forest; helping injured wild animals heal then letting them back into the wild. I can see myself doing all these things. I feel like all I can be is a vet; I can't see myself as anything else. Being with animals makes me feel safe, yet adventerous; it makes me feel loved, and cherished. I never want to let go of that feeling. Once I embrace it.

I don't know about many choices, nor how hard they can be. I can't relate to some because I haven't gone through them. Like making the choice to leave a loved one; or even just breaking up with a boy (or girl). But I have heard stories, it makes me feel like I have lived them. And just because I haven't lived them; doesn't mean I still can't give a bit of advice.

Other choices are made easily, but when actually trying to carry out the choice, well it can be a struggle.I know this, it happens to everyone; everyone who makes a New Years resolution and others; resolutions are made easy; but hard to actually succeed. Take mine for example; being unexpected, it's not something you can exactly buy now is it? I have to work, or I can just be myself, and surprise even me. You just need to have the will to do whatever choice you want to make. If you give up; either the choice wasn't for you, or you just stopped trying because it was too hard. Like asking for forgiveness.

Choices reminds me of a poem. One my friend M posted in December; it's about two roads. A choice. Too me, the poem is about either taking the road someone else makes for you or making a road for yourself. One not too many people take. That's my version of the poem. Only the strong; the ones who really believe they can do it, take it.

I am going to talk about some choices I am going to make. You see I am a bit of a people pleaser. I want to let that go. I please people because it makes me feel good that I made someone else happy. But sometimes I have to let go of what makes me happy to achieve that. My smile can be fake. So I am going to start pleasing someone else. Me. I think I really deserve it. (: It's time to make my smile real. I am done doing that, it's time to go my own way.

Well I have said a lot, and at this point I am just rambling, so I guess I could ramble about my day (:

It was great! First day of the semester; one that I will actually like too. I love all my classes. Even though we didn't get to do gym (we had to learn Fitness in the classroom), I still think that this semester is going to be amazing (: I can feel it. I LOVE LE FRENCH. It seriously makes my life <3

I also want to mention that my title in the last post, it didn't really fit my actual post unless you really could see the meaning behind the writing. It feels fantastic to let go; thats all I meant and all I mean.

Something completely off topic; I just want to talk about my favorite pastimes. What I like to do; I love rain, I love dancing it rain. I love to laugh, it just makes me feel so free. (: I of course like to write and sing; its a passion but I don't want to make it a global thing. I love watching the stars; one of my favorite memories is of me and my friends just lying on the grass or on the ramp by the lake at grade nine camp late at night just looking at the stars. I actually saw the Big Dipper for the first time. I love looking at the moon too; it is just so big! I love new moons, and full moons. Even the perfect cresent. Reading takes me to a whole other world; so does swimming; I get to experience something magical. Sometimes I wish, well actually all the time I wish I could just breath underwater so I can stay down there longer. I love campfires too; bonfires. Beach ones especially. I love any kind of fire actually. It is so warm and makes me smile, which makes me feel happy AND free. (:

Giants won the SuperBowl, I told you a change was coming.

Well I think thats all I am going to say tonight...haha  I have said a lot...to those who hate to read well I apologize; but I won't say sorry, because well I don't believe in saying sorry if I don't mean it. Thats a lesson I think everyone should learn.

Night <3

"Is okay to look fat"
"A princess never chases a chicken"
"You can go your own way"
"Try."
"Loving you, isn't the right thing to do"